In Alabama, the Iron Bowl is inescapable: The intrastate hate between the Tigers and Crimson Tide shows up everywhere ?�in politics, at family reunions, in music, indecipherable cartoons from 1907, horticulture. Saturday, the overheated gridiron rivalry inevitably seeped onto the gym mat when Auburn's Rachel Inniss�taunted Alabama fans with the Heisman pose in honor of Cam Newton in the middle of her floor routine at the Tuscaloosa NCAA regional, to a predictable reception from the hometown crowd (pose comes at the 1:15 mark):
Inventive, and effective: Amid the boos, I can only assume Crimson Tide fans wish one of their girls had thought of it first after Mark Ingram took home the trophy in 2009.
In fact, though, it wasn't really a dig to the hosts at all: Inniss has been doing the pose all year as part of her regular floor routine. (See the exact same routine, pose included, against LSU and Kentucky in January.) Which begs the question: Are we, as a football-crazed society, really down with the stiffarm being appropriated by the leotard set?
To answer that, we need to establish some generally accepted ground rules for striking the pose in the first place. In If the all-seeing eye of Google Images is any indication, you yourself have probably thrust an imaginary stiffarm or two in your day, probably for a camera. But by my count, there are really only a handful of acceptable occasions to do the Heisman right:
? If you are Tim Tebow and holding a baby.
? If you are an actual Heisman Trophy winner.
? If you are an attractive female goofing around before the game.
? If you are an attractive female mocking an actual Heisman Trophy winner with his own allegedly stolen property.
? If you are a legitimate Heisman frontrunner who has just made such an obviously Heisman-worthy play at a crucial moment in a big game late in the season that even the venerable play-by-announcer is compelled to cede you the award on national television, as opposed to making a big play in, say, the first half of a non-conference game against West Virginia in September.
? If you are the president.
? If you are goofing around with friends in an informal, unscripted, otherwise unmemorable moment.
The key element in each of these instances is spontaneity ? or at least the appearance of spontaneity ? which is ultimately were Inniss' tribute/diss falls short: Unless you're Tim Tebow, you only get one shot before it gets old, stale, rehearsed, maybe a little desperate. And even Tebow needs the baby.
True, Inniss is an attractive female. And in theory, a Heisman dig at a rival is not only an acceptable use of the pose but arguably the greatest, most inspired use in its storied history. If only she'd saved it for Tuscaloosa.
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Hat tip: The War Eagle Reader.
Matt Hinton is on Twitter: Follow him @DrSaturday.
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